Finding love might be challenging, especially after 2020. It is perfectly normal and natural to desire to have a loving relationship. Some people find it easier to find their partners, and for some others, it could take longer. It’s not that you are doing something wrong, we are who we are, but there are, however, practical habits you can incorporate to be more receptive to love.
Whether you have just broken up with your special person or you just want to find the right person to be with you, the first question you should ask yourself is why do you want to find a partner?
The truth is that most of us want to have a healthy, loving relationship –but you have to be careful not to idealize having a relationship as if it could fix anything that feels wrong in our life. You can however revise some of your habits and attitudes to help you find your loved one.
I know sometimes it is difficult to feel vulnerable, but meaningful relations take trust and sincerity. Unless you open up and show your true colors, it is difficult to find real intimacy.
I know that when you really desire a relationship it gets hard to trust that the universe is working with you, not against you, but you have to trust that every failed relationship, the time you spent alone, and the situations you’ve been through are lessons you had to learn to have a healthy relationship.
Do what you love
I used to think that finding love was like finding a new job –that’s a big mistake. When you believe being in a relationship is like one point in your checklist and you need to be out there to find love, it might result in feelings of guilt or stress when you cannot find a suitable partner.
How many times have you forced yourself into situations that didn’t feel right when all you wanted was to binge-watch your favorite series? Love will find you when you are doing what you want and love.
You are worthy of love
A lot of people believe that they simply don’t deserve to be loved –this might be due to an unsolved trauma. This is not true, tell yourself often that everyone deserves to be loved. You too.
Ask yourself why you think you need to have a relationship
Do you feel lonely? You can have a relationship and feel extremely lonely too. You have to take care of yourself first –this might sound like a cliché, but it’s true. Listen to yourself and identify what your needs are.
Consider your needs
When you do get to know your significant other, please make sure your needs are met. See if the person brings you joy to your life if you trust them. Do not settle for less than you deserve, there is someone there for you, enjoy the journey to love.
One of the best pieces of advice I was given was: the way we treat ourselves tells other people what we feel we deserve, so if you want to find a nice person by your side: practice selfcare.